Courtship

The UPDV preserves two narrative scenes that fall under the umbrella of courtship — one in Judges, one in Ruth. The two together show ancient practice from opposite directions: a suitor visiting the woman, and a woman approaching the man.

A Suitor Visits the Woman

Samson's first marriage opens with the suitor going down to the woman himself: "And he went down, and talked with the woman, and she pleased Samson well" (Judg 14:7). The verse compresses the visit into two acts — talking, and being pleased — and lets the spoken meeting between suitor and woman stand as the courtship moment.

A Woman Approaches the Man

The second scene reverses the direction. Ruth comes by night to Boaz at the threshing-floor and speaks first: "And he said, Who are you? And she answered, I am Ruth your slave: spread therefore your skirt over your slave; for you are a near kinsman" (Ruth 3:9). The phrase "spread your skirt" is the woman's request, framed in terms of kinship obligation rather than romantic preference.

Boaz answers in kind, reading the approach as an act of "kindness" set above the alternative of seeking out younger men: "Blessed be you of Yahweh, my daughter: you have shown more kindness in the latter end than at the beginning, inasmuch as you didn't follow young men, whether poor or rich" (Ruth 3:10). His reply names the public reputation of the woman herself as the qualifier — "all the city of my people does know that you are a worthy woman" (Ruth 3:11) — and he commits to act on her word, "I will do to you all that you say."

The proposal does not finalize on the spot. There is a nearer kinsman to clear first: "And now it is true that I am a near kinsman; nevertheless there is a kinsman nearer than I" (Ruth 3:12). The night's plan is therefore conditional and patient: "Tarry this night, and it will be in the morning, that if he will perform to you the part of a kinsman, good; let him do the kinsman's part: but if he will not do the part of a kinsman to you, then I will do the part of a kinsman to you, as Yahweh lives: lie down until the morning" (Ruth 3:13).

Two Patterns

The two scenes set down two recognizable shapes for courtship: a man going to a woman to talk and be pleased, and a woman going to a man to invoke a kinsman's obligation. Both are told plainly and without comment, and in each case the verbal exchange — the talking, the request, the blessing, the conditional pledge — is what the narrative records.