Hemorrhoids

In the UPDV, "hemorrhoids" / "emerods" / "tumors" name a single affliction: a painful swelling sent by Yahweh as a stroke of judgment. The disease appears in two settings — the covenant curses of Deuteronomy, where it is one of several incurable plagues threatened against a faithless Israel, and the narrative of 1 Samuel 5-6, where Yahweh strikes the Philistine cities that hold his ark. The two passages share vocabulary and theology: the affliction is from Yahweh's hand, it is bodily and humiliating, and it is reckoned alongside other named ulcerative or inflammatory diseases of the ancient Near East.

A Covenant Curse

In the curses of De 28, the affliction stands in a list of bodily diseases that Yahweh will inflict on a covenant-breaking people. "[The Speech of] Yahweh will strike you with the boil of Egypt, and with the emerods, and with the scurvy, and with the itch, of which you can't be healed" (De 28:27). The wording places "emerods" in the same series as the boil that Egypt knew, the scurvy, and the itch — four named diseases grouped by their incurability. The curse is bodily, public, and beyond medical remedy.

The Stroke on the Philistines

The Philistines capture the ark of God at Ebenezer and place it first in Ashdod, then in Gath, then in Ekron. At each stage Yahweh's hand strikes the city. At Ashdod: "But the hand of Yahweh was heavy on them of Ashdod, and he destroyed them, and struck them with tumors, even Ashdod and its borders" (1Sa 5:6). When the ark is moved to Gath, "the hand of Yahweh was against the city with a very great discomfiture: and he struck the men of the city, both small and great; and tumors broke out on them" (1Sa 5:9). At Ekron the affliction reaches a crisis: "They sent therefore and gathered together all the lords of the Philistines, and they said, Send away the ark of the God of Israel, and let it go again to its own place, that it doesn't slay us, and our people. For there was a deadly discomfiture throughout all the city; the hand of God was very heavy there" (1Sa 5:11). The chapter closes on the survivors: "And the men who didn't die were struck with the tumors; and the cry of the city went up to heaven" (1Sa 5:12).

The same Hebrew word the older versions render "emerods" UPDV renders "tumors." The disease is paired throughout 1 Samuel 5-6 with a parallel infestation of mice ravaging the land, and the two together press the Philistines toward returning the ark.

The Trespass-Offering

When the Philistine priests and diviners are consulted, they prescribe a guilt-offering matched to the affliction itself: "Then they said, What will be the trespass-offering which we will return to him? And they said, Five golden tumors, and five golden mice, [according to] the number of the lords of the Philistines; for the same plague was on all of you⁺, and on your⁺ lords" (1Sa 6:4). The reasoning follows in the next verse: "Therefore you⁺ will make images of your⁺ tumors, and images of your⁺ mice that mar the land; and you⁺ will give glory to the God of Israel: perhaps he will lighten his hand from off you⁺, and from off your⁺ gods, and from off your⁺ land" (1Sa 6:5). The image of the disease — cast in gold — is the offering. The Philistines load it onto the cart with the ark itself: "and they put the ark of Yahweh on the cart, and the coffer with the mice of gold and the images of their tumors" (1Sa 6:11).

A summary inventory closes the trespass-offering: "And these are the golden tumors which the Philistines returned for a trespass-offering to Yahweh: for Ashdod one, for Gaza one, for Ashkelon one, for Gath one, for Ekron one" (1Sa 6:17). The five golden tumors correspond to the five Philistine lords — one each for Ashdod, Gaza, Ashkelon, Gath, and Ekron — making the offering a cast representation of the divine stroke witnessed across the five named cities of the pentapolis.

Yahweh's Hand

Across both passages the language is consistent. The affliction is an act of "the hand of Yahweh" (1Sa 5:6, 1Sa 5:11) — heavy, deadly, and not relieved until the ark is returned and the gold trespass-offering is sent. In Deuteronomy the same kind of stroke is held out as a covenant threat against Israel itself. The disease is not a generic illness but a specific judicial sign: bodily, incurable apart from divine relenting, and tied directly to a wrong done to Yahweh or his presence.